Spiritual leadership in dating relationships
When looking at spiritual leadership, we may need to set aside some traditional thinking on what makes a leader. He came to be a servant (Mark ) and a shepherd (John 10).
THE LEADER AS A SERVANT In Matthew -28 Jesus explained how kingdom values affected leadership style. In the absence of a servant he took on the role of a servant and washed the disciples feet. We don’t move from servanthood on to something else.
We are his “fellow-workers,” his “ambassadors,” his “representatives,” his “servants,” and “ministers.” The Psalmist expressed it best when he wrote, “Your path led through the sea, your way through the mighty waters, though your footprints were not seen.
You led your people like a flock by the hand of Moses and Aaron.” Psalm ,20 WHAT IS SPIRITUAL LEADERSHIP?
Leadership training then, is really learning to shepherd and learning to serve.
A LEADER PEOPLE WANT TO FOLLOW Spiritual leadership is a combination of acquired traits that when blended together form the basis of leadership.
“You know that the rulers of the Gentiles lord it over them, and their high officials exercise authority over them. Instead, whoever wants to become great among you must be your servant, and whoever wants to be first must be your slave--just as the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many.” Jesus did not criticize a person’s desire for leadership, he simply defined the path to that leadership. After washing the disciples feet he concludes with this poignant lesson on leadership; “Now that I, your Lord and Teacher, have washed your feet, you also should wash one another’s feet. The silver thread running through everything we do is that of servant-leadership.
I have set you an example that you should do as I have done for you.” (John ) The essence of spiritual leadership is following Jesus and serving people. Leadership that does not involve servanthood is not spiritual leadership.
But still, assuming that leadership gifts aren't doled out along gender lines, and that many women possess the key traits needed for top-notch leadership, what might this mean for Christian dating and marriage—in which many Christians believe the man should lead?
Students often ask me and my husband, Shawn, to walk them through premarital counseling or mentoring as part of a program offered at our university. Not all of the couples are engaged; some are merely contemplating marriage.